Many women have a certain amount of fear associated with their first boudoir session. This is totally understandable, since it's completely out of most people's comfort zone. So, let me put a few things out there to help assuage any fears you might have.
I send out over half a dozen emails before your session to help you prepare. These emails help you figure out how to best flatter your frame, things you can do to prepare for the best session ever, and more. And my clients can respond to any of those emails if they have questions regarding them. Not to mention, at any time you can pick up the phone and call me. If I'm with a client, I can't answer, but I return calls same day every time.
I've had many women tell me that they would love to do a session, but they have no idea how to pose. Let me reassure you... few people come to me knowing how to pose. Most people have no model training. Again, have no fear, because I will show you how to rock every single pose. Most of the poses I will do first and show you how to do them, and then I will direct you as you move. It actually becomes very technical... a slight move of the head here, a slight angle of the foot there. And everyone comes to me with different degrees of flexibility and fitness, but we can work around any issues you have. I've got you covered!
Another concern that most women have, although not all, is their weight. I've had so many women tell me that they are waiting to book a session until they have lost a certain amount of weight. While everyone has a weight in mind that they consider ideal for themselves, few of us are actually where we want to be. And if you're using a boudoir session to incentivize yourself to get to the point you want to be, then go for it. But it's not necessary. More weight equals more curves. And curves are fun to showcase! If you're worried about your tummy or your arms or some other area of your body that you are not in love with, all you have to do is be completely open with me about your concerns. This is not about getting you to accept the things you don't love, but about showcasing the things you do. This is done through wardrobe choices and posing. Again, I've got you covered!
And when it comes to wardrobe, bring those things that make you feel your sexiest! Not everything photographs well, but I have enough experience to know which will work. Bring it all, and we'll sort through it here.
And sometimes we are just not comfortable in our skin. I understand that, too. If you have not yet tried shapewear, I highly recommend it! Nude or black shapewear will be your best friend. If you tend to lean towards black lingerie, then I recommend black shapewear. It blends with the lingerie in pictures. And it keeps everything tight and lifted and in its place. Look for pieces with good boning, or pieces that go over your shoulder so that nothing rolls down. Sometimes this little addition to your wardrobe is all you need to feel completely confident in your lingerie.
Years of speaking to women before their session have taught me that a woman's biggest fear is watching all of her insecurities laid out before her... A fear that she's going to see them in every single image. But boudoir photography is the opposite of that. Intimate portraits are about showcasing your assets. We all have things about us that are sexy, and a boudoir session is about bringing those to the forefront of your images.
So, as you are getting ready for your session... Hair, makeup, and girl chat... Be as open as you can about your fears and your insecurities, and then throw them out the window and trust the process. This, ladies, is how you will blow your own mind! You will leave feeling completely transformed… you will see yourself in a beautiful new light, and this is something every woman deserves.
I've said it so often that I feel like I'm on repeat... we see ourselves so two-dimensionally. We look in the mirror, but we don't take our whole self in. We look in the mirror, and we start to pick apart all the little things that we don't love about ourselves. We focus on them. Sometimes we will rock a pose, and try to make ourselves look the way we want to look. But even then, do our eyes go to the beautiful areas we've just highlighted? Or do they, in that moment, still go to what we consider our problem areas? I know the answer. And honestly, it's sad. And we all need to stop doing it. I include myself in this "all."
I know from experience that it's very hard to give yourself the win. But it's necessary!
I love the expression, "we eat with our eyes." When food is served to us, we take it in with our eyes first. That stokes our appetite. We begin to salivate and we can't wait to try what is in front of us.
You can buy fruit at the grocery store and throw it in a basket. But when you see a basket displayed beautifully, you want it. You want it more than you see the fruit thrown into a basket. You want the fruit that's been carefully placed with its most beautiful parts showcased. Ladies, those two baskets of fruit taste the same. But remember... We eat with our eyes first.
And so it is with boudoir photography. It doesn't change the way you look. It doesn't change your body. What it does is highlight the beauty. It puts your favorite things on display. It allows not only your significant other, but YOU, to eat with your eyes first. To feast on the beauty. To ignore the fact that the blemished apple is blemished side down. Because the apples taste the same, regardless.
We don't see ourselves the way others see us. They see us from every angle. From the side, sometimes from below us, sometimes they see our best angles, and sometimes they see our worst angles. But all of those angles make up the whole. We all have unflattering angles, and we all have amazingly flattering angles.
Do you ever see a picture of yourself that's terrible and you immediately feel sad that you look like that? I do. I think we all do. But you have to remember, that is only one line of the story. There is so much more to the story. Do you ever see a picture of yourself that you think is exceptionally flattering? Like, you look at it and you think... “I didn't know I could look that good?” Because that happens, too. But let me tell you one thing that I have noticed... When women see a picture of themselves that they don't like, they say, "I look terrible." When they see a beautiful picture of themselves, they say, "That's a great picture." They put the negative on themselves, and they attribute the positive to the picture, and not to themselves. Guess what? That picture is another line of your story. It is also the truth. Both of those pictures are the truth. And there are many other pictures of the truth. They all go together to showcase the whole.
In photography, especially in intimate portraits, we want to showcase your sexiest, best self. Will there still be things about you that you don't love? Of course! But the transformative part of this type of photography is that you will see yourself in a whole other light. You will realize that you can be that beautiful basket of fruit any day you want to. And if you don't feel like it building a glamorous basket, you can throw the fruit in a plastic bag and call it a day. And none of it changes the truth.
The most beautiful people are the ones that carry themselves with confidence. It has little to do with their physical appearances, and way more to do with how they feel about themselves.
And this, ladies, is my favorite thing about Boudoir photography. It allows you to feel good about yourself. It showcases your beauty. It shows you who you can be anytime you want. It gives you the confidence to walk tall, knowing your potential.
If you happen to live anywhere near Corpus Christi, Texas, I’m happy to be your boudoir photographer. If you’re not in the area and you need this in your life, please get in touch so I can connect you to a boudoir professional in your area.
The above images were taken with my cell phone on a timer and are unedited. They in no way reflect my actual photography skills. Please notice how the face appears to change shape as the camera is further from it. The images were cropped to the same size to make for easy comparison.
I am constantly explaining to anyone who will listen… you do NOT look like your selfie! Check out your feed from any social media platform and examine all the selfies. Those pictures are taken close to the face and they are seriously distorted. The current trend is to get your eyes closest to the phone to make sure they look huge! You’ve seen this, right?
The problem comes when your nose is actually the closest thing to the camera. The closer your face is to the camera, the more distortion your image will have. Period. Whatever is closest will appear the largest. Your nose will ALWAYS look bigger than it is in a standard selfie. Always.
I read a fantastic article in Newsweek and it explained that more people are getting nose jobs because they don’t like the way they look in their selfies. What?!? Oh my gosh, y’all… we have GOT to educate ourselves! Your nose appears about 30% larger in a selfie. That’s a HUGE disparity between image and reality!
This excerpt really stood out to me… “In January, a survey by the American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery (AAFPRS) found that 55 percent of plastic surgeons said that their patients requested surgery to enhance their face to look better for selfies in 2017, while only 13 percent claimed to have executed a selfie-related surgery in 2016.”
So what’s going on? People are taking a standard selfie and the camera is about a foot from their face. There are simple solutions… my favorite is the selfie stick. It’s awesome, even if your running buddies tease you about it… then all admit they secretly love the effect. It gets the camera away from you. And what is optimal for an accurate image? About five feet away. The selfie stick can do this. But what if you don’t have a selfie stick? Put your camera on a timer, set it down, and step back. Or grab the nearest person and have him or her take the picture for you.
But let me tell you what you should NOT do… you should not look at an image taken from a foot away and think it’s an accurate depiction of your face. It is not.
I constantly consider what my clients say to me about the way they feel concerning their looks. It’s fascinating, but mostly it makes me sad… they don’t even realize that they have a distorted perception of themselves.
We see ourselves in only two dimensions… we look in the mirror and that is that. Or we take a selfie (see above). Neither showcases your best angles – only singular angles.
Want to know what your angles REALLY look like? Want to see the beauty that others see, but that you keep denying? You need someone ELSE to take the pictures. You need perspective.
You’ve booked the session and you’re in full planning mode! But… what should you wear?
This is one of the most common questions my clients have when they call and the answer is simple: Whatever you want. Seriously. It really IS that simple.
At a minimum, you will need to bring a sexy (and supportive!) black bra and a black thong (yes, even if you don’t regularly wear them). Everything else is icing on the cake.
Are you a fan of sexy bra and panty sets? Bring those! Do you have a collection of lingerie you’ve never actually seen yourself in? It’s time! Are you wanting to break out of your norm and shop? Buy what you FEEL sexy wearing. That’s really what it’s all about – the way you feel. THAT is what will convey in your images.
If you have things you want to conceal, find sexy sets that do that for you. Or bring along sexy fabrics and/or robes.
If you have things you want to flaunt, bring things that assist with showcasing your best assets.
You cannot fail at this – I’ve got you! I’ve done entire sessions with a single panty and bra set. Because when it’s all said and done, it’s all about the posing and the angles. Ladies, I WILL showcase your best angles. It’s that simple.
When you arrive for your appointment, we’ll go through everything you brought and put together three looks for you from what you’ve brought and from what I have available. We will work together to show you that you DO have that sexy chick inside you who CAN bring it when she wants to!
So, what should you wear for your boudoir session?
Whatever you want ;)
You’ve been considering a boudoir session, but there are so many things that make you nervous about it, right? Nervous isn’t such a bad thing… it usually holds hands with excitement!
Knowing more will help you get excited, instead of nervous. Here’s how to rock your session!
1. Trust your Photographer. We will take our time getting to know each other before we ever get near a camera. I need to know you and you need to trust me. This WILL happen. Once you realize it’s just us girls, having a fun day together, it’s easy to relax into it. I won’t ask you to do anything I can’t demonstrate to you, because some people take verbal direction easily, while others need visual instructions – I’m an excellent teacher! We’ve got this!
2. Relax. No, this won’t happen immediately, but when it does… magic happens. The minute you really start to own your session, YOU shine through and so does your sexy! I can pose you all day, but when you start moving your own body, it all comes together flawlessly. Don’t be shy about it – if it feels right, do it. Worst case, it doesn’t look like it feels and you never even have to see it. Culling images is part of what I do – you’ll only ever have to see the gorgeous ones! So if it bends, bend it. If it feels right to run your hand down your face and neck, please, carry on. I may guide you along the way, but if you can relax and truly OWN your session, you will blow your own mind – I promise.
3. GO SHOPPING! For many ladies, a boudoir session is a “once in a lifetime” adventure. Treat yourself. Get some lingerie that makes you feel sexy. It’ll also help you feel prepared for your session.
4. Talk to me. Have an idea? Share it. Want to try a certain pose? Tell me. Have questions? Ask. I am easy to talk to and I will help you see yourself in ways you never imagined. Trust the process. You will walk away feeling like a queen, but you MUST get comfortable talking to me. For those of you who are a little more on the shy side, come meet me in person! Give me a call and we’ll set it up.
5. Prepare. Get a good nights’ sleep. Have a decent breakfast. Wash and dry your hair the night before. Come in with a clean face. I’ve got the rest ;)
Ladies, if you have any questions, always feel free to call me. I’m accessible.
So, what’s stopping you?
What’s stopping you? 12 Reasons to Book a Boudoir Session
Do you love your body? Or do you look in the mirror and see only the flaws?
I’ve struggled my whole life with focusing on the beauty. Ironically, the older I get, the better I am at appreciating the beauty and disregarding the flaws. But that has taken years of conscious effort. My favorite thing about boudoir photography is showing women their beauty… showcasing the raw sexiness that is woman.
But there are PLENTY of reasons to book a boudoir session…